he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize
