What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
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