dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
Randomize
