Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
