Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Randomize
