No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
I fill condoms, not promises.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Randomize
