I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
Randomize
