and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Randomize
