I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Randomize
