Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
she looked like the before picture.
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
Randomize
