I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Randomize
