Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
He disabled his match.com account in front of me
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
She needs sedatives and a leash
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
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