So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
Randomize
