did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
He pulled a kid having a seizure out of a car and stayed with him until the ambulance came.
he what???
Not kidding. My ovaries cannot handle this shit...swear next time he'll rescue a bunch of pound puppies and hand them out to lonely orphans.
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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