I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
and i looked up. we had an audience...
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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