You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
