Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
Randomize