he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
