Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
I can't believe I forgot to wish you a happy 13 week-iversary of the time you raw-dogged a rando. Only two days late, so it still counts. And since your 14 weeks is coming up, you should know that at 14 weeks your baby can squint, frown, grimace, pee, and possibly suck his/her/their/zir thumb!
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
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