Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
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