This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
Randomize
