I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
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