Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
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