but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
Send help, water and tortillas.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
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