You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
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