My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
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