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• (812): View more from Indiana

  Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.

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• (970): View more from Colorado

  Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.

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• (551): View more from New Jersey

  1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.

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• (206): View more from Washington

  And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny

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• (620): View more from Kansas

  You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.

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• (231): View more from Michigan

  You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.

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• (617): View more from Massachusetts

  What time did you start drinking?

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  Maybe.

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  Maybe isn't a time...

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• (208): View more from Idaho

  I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same

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• (914): View more from New York

  Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious

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• (901): View more from Tennessee

  No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.

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• (972): View more from Texas

  I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities

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• (519): View more from Ontario

  You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything

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• (323): View more from California

  Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.

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• (330): View more from Ohio

  After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.

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• (425): View more from Washington

  Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND

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