she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
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