I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Randomize
