To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
sex in a hospital.. check
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
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