You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
I AM VODKA MAN
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
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