my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
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