Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
Randomize
