Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
Randomize
