Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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