Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
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