We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Randomize
