Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
Randomize
