So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
Randomize
