Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(615): View more from Tennessee

Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.

(1-615): View more from Tennessee

I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.

(615): View more from Tennessee

Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.

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(573): View more from Missouri

worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.

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(281): View more from Texas

I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass

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(774): View more from Massachusetts

WE ARE DOOMED.

(774): View more from Massachusetts

And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.

(860): View more from Connecticut

it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure

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(413): View more from Massachusetts

I’m going to Lewinsky this place

(1-413): View more from Massachusetts

That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying

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