yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
Randomize