When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
That reminds me...we need to get swords
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
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