I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
