I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
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