i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
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