why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
