the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
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