I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
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