he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
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