I think this baby is eyeing my beer
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
Randomize
