I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
Randomize
