good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
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